When I entertain, my goal is to be a relaxed hostess. (I definitely don’t enjoy a fire drill!) For decades, two of my favorite entertaining mentors have been Martha Stewart and Ina Garten. In her first book, Entertaining, Martha Stewart provided a perfect model for drop-dead beautiful parties. Even though her level of perfection made her book a bit more aspirational than practical, she inspired millions of us to take our entertaining game to the next level. Ina Garten made it all more attainable, giving us permission to enjoy our own parties. Her book Parties is still on my bookshelf. Remember, the party is for you too!
If I’ve planned a gathering, I give myself the gift of clearing the decks as much as I can, planning ahead and making a game plan that goes beyond the shopping list. Setting out platters with post-it notes – a tip from Ina Garten – helps make the transition from cooking to serving easy to visualize.
Another of the many things I’ve taken away from my many years of following Ina Garten is the permission to let go of perfection and the need to make everything from scratch. Ina encourages mixing homemade with store bought, and I heartily agree. Here’s just one example: for a pizza-making party, I would buy the dough pre-made, freeing myself up to concentrate on inventive toppings or a special cocktail for the evening.
I set the table the day before, giving myself time to enjoy the process of putting it all together. Much like interior design, setting the table involves establishing a palette, which helps set the mood. Whether your gathering is fun and eclectic or over-the-top formal, it pays to think ahead, set things out and give yourself time to come up with original ideas…creativity takes time!
Place cards are a great organizer. They help allay any awkwardness when your guests head to the table. Thinking about the seating arrangements in advance helps you balance the energy in the room. I like to put the talkers in the middle of the table, to help keep the conversations flowing, and I sometimes even break up couples, which keeps things lively and interesting.
Don’t be afraid to ask your guests to bring a little something. Everyone loves to contribute! Make casual gatherings engaging and interactive: home-made pizza parties with a mixture of toppings for individual pies, or a pot of chili with a variety of toppings that guests can choose from, are fun and entertaining. They also lend themselves to prepping ahead – another key to stress-free entertaining.
A signature cocktail is a great way to set the tone. Whether it’s a cranberry spritz at a Thanksgiving gathering, a holiday punch or warm toddy on Christmas eve, or Prosecco with pomegranate aerials to ring in the New Year, a themed cocktail can light up a party. This Thanksgiving Cider Punch from Half-Baked Harvest is delicious and presents beautifully.
I always love a party favor, particularly when they are woven into the table decor. It provides an extra touch that makes guests feel special, and isn’t that what entertaining is all about? Some of my favorites: paperwhites in a small burlap bag, chocolates in a pretty box (either homemade or from a favorite purveyor), a caramel apple tied with a bow, a glass vase with pine greens tied with a ribbon, or a mini champagne bottle tied with a straw. Sending your guests home with a small treat will keep the gathering alive long after the lights go out.
1. Start with the essentials
Display a mix of glasses—such as wine glasses, highballs, and champagne flutes. If you have favorites or unique pieces, now is the time to showcase them! Choose a selection of your favorite spirits and place the taller bottles in the back, the smaller ones up front. Avoid overcrowding; about 3-5 bottles work well for a sophisticated look.
2. Use trays and containers
Trays help keep items organized and grouped. Try a marble, brass, or wooden tray that complements the cart and room decor. A small tray can hold bar essentials like an opener, jigger, cocktail shaker, and mixing spoon, while small dishes or containers are great for items like cocktail stirrers, napkins, or garnishes.
3. Add fresh or dried elements
Bring in fresh citrus and herbs. Place lemons, limes, or sprigs of rosemary and mint in a small bowl for color and easy cocktail garnishes. For a longer-lasting look, dried orange slices or lavender sprigs add texture and visual appeal.
4. Incorporate a decorative element
Books, small artwork and candles each add their own flair. Stack a couple of cocktail recipe books, place a small piece of artwork or a favorite photo on or behind the cart – extra points if it supports the theme – and add a stylish candle to add a warm glow.
5. Keep balance in mind
Symmetry can be helpful, especially if the cart is open on both sides, but feel free to balance items asymmetrically to create interest. Place taller items (like wine bottles or a vase) opposite clusters of smaller items for a balanced look.
6. Add something fun
A small potted plant, like a succulent or fern, can add a pop of green, and quirky or vintage pieces, like a retro decanter, ornate bottle stopper, or vintage bottle opener add personality.
7. Keep it in season!
In winter, add a sprig of pine, or in the summer, integrate fresh blooms or brightly colored accents.
Keeping it curated yet practical makes for a stylish bar cart that invites people to belly up and mix up their favorite drink.
Holiday gatherings call for gifts to show your host or hostess how much you appreciate them. Cut flowers are beautiful, but I like to bring gifts that my hosts can enjoy the next day…or the next. I try to think of something my host or hostess might not buy for themselves. And I love a good gift stash. I keep some of my favorite hostess gifts wrapped and ready to go, just in case. It’s a great way to make the holiday season a little less hectic. Everyone should have one!
Here are a few of my favorites…
A candle and matches, or a candle and hand soap – the kitchen candle in Tart Kumquat from Hudson Grace is divine and their holiday matches make it festive.
A small potted plant, like this Kimberly potted fern from Terrain – because everyone could use a little greenery.
A diffuser or room spray – they’re nice alternatives to the more expected candle. Jo Malone’s Wood Sage & Sea Salt Diffuser is perfect for the season, and the 34 Boulevard St. Germain Room Spray from Dyptique Paris showcases its signature scent.
You can’t go wrong with artisan tea, coffee or chocolate – thoughtfully wrapped of course. Holiday Green Tea from Palais des Thes, Hazelnut Cream Whole Bean Coffee from San Francisco Bay Coffee, and Woodhouse Chocolates are three of my favorites.
A small cutting board or cheese knife – because everyone can use an upgrade. A White Oak Cutting Board from KM Home and Woodbury Cheese Knives from Hudson Grace are great options.
A coffee table book about something they love – Shira Gill’s book Lifestyled comes out in December, just in time for holiday gift-giving.
Mugs filled with hot chocolate fixings – mugs from Alex Marshall Studios are a go-to for me.
Olive oil and balsamic vinegar – I like to give consumable things because I know they will be used! Try Ancient Olive Trees oil and vinegar from KM Home.
A chic set of playing cards, dominoes, or backgammon in elegant packaging – they’re perfect for holiday gatherings. Blvck Paris playing cards, Mark & Graham’s leather domino and backgammon sets each add a touch of style to any coffee table.
A beautiful decanter– like the glass wine & whiskey decanter from Hudson Grace – filled with an artisan liqueur or spirit makes for a high-end gift that’s both decorative and functional.
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